Is it time to move in with my partner?

Every couple hits certain milestones in their relationships. First year anniversaries, first birthdays, first times…

Naturally, there may come a time when as a couple you decide you want to start living together. In, fact the 2021 census showed that the number of couples who are cohabiting (not married or in a civil partnership) increased from 20.6 per cent in 2011 to 24.3 per cent in 2021.

Moving in together can be a really exciting time for a couple, it can be the next step in what will hopefully prove a long and fruitful partnership.

But it can also be a time of uncertainty. Living together might spread the cost of bills and help you save money, but it is essential to think beyond just your pockets.

So, before deciding whether or not to take the plunge and start living together, here are some things for you as a couple to ponder.

Have the ‘money' talk

When first deciding whether to move in together it is actually helpful to take money out of the equation. 

Imagine a world where money and financial pressures do not exist, would you be happy living with your partner? Do you get a good energy from another? And can you imagine being around them for long periods each and every day?

If the answer is still a resounding yes, then it is time to consider the realities of money. 

You will need to discuss how you will split rent or mortgage payments, as well as utility bills and any monthly subscriptions you will take out. Will you maintain separate bank accounts? If so, whose account do payments come out of? Do you get a joint account just for bills?

Alternatively, if you both presently live alone and decide to move into the other person's condo, you could consider letting out the other property during this stage in case living together does not work out the way you planned.

Compromise is king

We all have our habits around the home and we all have our own personalities and way of wanting to live our lives.

And that is fine, you should always maintain that level of individuality. But you also need to remember that when you cohabit there is more than just yourself to think of.

For instance, it might be that you are quite liberal about when to do the dishes but your partner might be stressed and distracted by mess and clutter.

In essence, the key to a happy living arrangement is compromise.

Make key decisions together. Who will clean on what day and what cleaning responsibilities will they have? Do you prefer to eat white bread or brown bread? Who will do the cooking? Indeed, will you eat together or eat alone? 

No one is going to pretend that as a couple you will never have disagreements or arguments but finding that middle ground is going to be crucial to making a success of living together.

Signs you are ready to move in together

If you are still on the fence about whether now is the right time to take your relationship to the next level, think about these key factors.

Do you have good communication? The ability to be open about the key facets of your lives, whether that be work or family, is crucial for making a success of living together.

Do you accept the other person for who they are? There might be something that really irritates you about your partner but if you can love them – indeed even embrace them – for that perceived flaw then you're onto a winner.

Do you have good a social life independent of your partner? While it is great you are even thinking of living together, ensuring you spend some time apart can be important.

Essentially, take a good hard, think before taking the next step in your relationship…but if you tick all the boxes then happy home hunting!